Lev Lazinskiy

Now What?

I have a dream last night where I saw my grandpa giving a speech. But in the dream I was watching myself watching him give a speech. I was crying, I miss him.

But maybe this was a sign? He was a huge Trump supporter, he found a way to bring him up every time we had a conversation over the last few years. We never agreed much on politics, but we always had thoughtful discussions and I miss those too.

Then I woke up, checked out WSJ, for a brief few seconds had a tiny bit of hope and then saw that Trump won. It wasn’t even close. Ugh. Fuck.

It’s hard for me to believe that we allowed this to happen. But knowing what I know about our history, society, and the current political climate, is it really that surprising? It feels unjust, but so does most of American history. Why should we be the exception?

I read this piece from Bret Stephens today. It’s not a fun read, but I appreciated his perspective on how we got here. I also re-read this old gem from the last time we did this. I also enjoyed reading Eugene Robinson’s coping strategies.

I feel worried about the future. For our society as a whole, but also selfishly for myself and my family. Our immigration status is still in bureaucratic limbo, will they actually renew? We’re going to be returning from China a few weeks after inauguration, will we be able to come back in? We are talking about adopting in the future, will that be legal? Will our marriage?

I sure as hell hope so, but who the fuck knows anymore.

Kamala gives me hope. She inspires me. I wish America was ready for someone like her and I still believe one day it will be. When that day comes I will think of Kamala Harris and give her my deepest thanks for paving the way.

In the meantime, we can all take some time to mourn, regroup, and then live fight another day. Just gotta keep living, spread joy, and don’t give up.